Arranged marriages were very popular in the traditional societies across the world. Arranged marriage was considered the best way through which a man or woman of right age can get the right life partner for the continuity of a given lineage. However, modernization and westernization has changed this mindset about arranged marriages not only in the Western countries, but also in various parts of the world.
Inasmuch as arranged marriages are still common all over the world, many people now prefer selecting their life partners through unarranged processes. The debate about the relevance of arranged marriages is still raging in various societies across the world.
The practice is still common among the Muslim communities, but the current generation is very keen on selecting their life partners based on love other than through arranged processes. This does not mean that arranged marriages are non-existence in the modern society. According to Tseng (127), arranged marriages are still common in the current society. The researcher seeks to determine the benefits and shortcomings of having arranged marriages.
Arranged married were very common in the past societies. Many factors made arranged marriages to be very important in the traditional societies. Entezar (52) gives an example of a typical Muslim society in Saudi Arabia where arranged marriages were very common in the past.
They can look at the world from their own perspective to determine what they want in life. The main question that many people have been asking is the relevance of arranged marriages in the current liberated society. In the past, young adults would not mingle easily, and this made it difficult to choose the right life partner. In the current society, this has changed as the education system makes it possible for these people to interact very closely.
Despite these facts, a number of people still find arranged marriages very important for the well-being of the couple and the community at large. At this stage, it will be important to analyze the benefits and shortcomings of arranged marriages.
This is an indication that even with all the education that their children may have and the westernizations- having been born and brought up in the west, the parents always have the feeling that their children could make a mistake when choosing their life partners. This creates a feeling that they should play a role in making this important choice. This is a strong suggestion that arranged marriages have benefits that should not be ignored.
One of the biggest advantages of the arranged marriages is that the partners will have a perfect match when it comes to culture, religion, social status, lifestyle, and many other factors that always affected the compatibility of couples. As Browne (83) notes, basing marriage on love is great, but sometimes when love defines everything, then one would be blinded to some of the social incompatibilities that may make life difficult for the couple after marriage.
It is a fact that in arranged marriages, the couple gets to benefit from the support they get from their parents and family members. When parents and members of the community are allowed to play part in arranging the marriage, they will feel honored. They will take all the responsibilities in the entire marriage process. The parties who are getting into this union will be relieved of the financial burden that is involved in organizing the marriage.
According to a survey conducted by Roberts (2), arranged marriages are becoming less common in the modern society. This is so because people have come to realize that arranged marriages have a number of flaws that make them undesirable. Below is the results obtained from the survey in four countries about the attitude of members of the society towards arranged marriages.
Given the sensitivity of this issue, one should be allowed to take time to understand the other person who is supposed to be the life partner. This would require a long time of interaction, trying to understand the personality of the person to determine if a life together can be a personality. The opportunity that is denied to people who engage in arranged marriages.
According to Lamanna and Riedmann (33), in most of the cases, couples in arranged marriages find themselves in union with people who have contrasting personalities. It is important to appreciate that sharing religious belief, cultural practices, or social status may not necessarily make them compatible. The personalities of an individual may not be rigidly defined using demographical factors. Sometimes people of a completely different caste may find themselves more compatible than those that share their caste.
What makes the whole system very complex is the attachment that members of the family will have on that marriage. The two couple may be forced to stay together even if they find fundamental contrasts in their personalities simply because their parents and community members arranged their marriage. Such people will stay in their marriages because of the wish of their parents. As Entezar (67) notes, the marriage will cease to be blissful, and it will turn into a prison, as demonstrated in the figure below.
As demonstrated in the above figure, the partners will have more questions than answers in their union. Happiness will be gone, and in most of the cases, they will be regretting why they accepted the union in the first place. According to Lamanna and Riedmann (33), love in arranged marriages takes a secondary position. The partners are not given time to bond and develop love towards each other before their marriage.
The research by Browne (47) shows that arranged marriages are vulnerable to interferences from the external forces. When family members participate in bringing the couple together, they will develop a feeling that they have the right to define the way the family is run. Each of the family members will make an effort to define the way the couple will be leading their lives. In some cases, these family members may find themselves positions in the newly created family.
Arranged marriages are still commonly practiced in the modern society. It is clear from the above discussion that this form of marriage was more common in the traditional societies than it is in the current society. However, even in the current society, it is clear that one cannot dismiss the relevance of arranged marriages.
These marriages help in bringing family members together when choosing a life partner. This research reveals that despite these advantages, arranged marriages also have shortcomings that should be considered before a family can subject one of their own to it. Based on this discussion, using a blend of arranged and unarranged marriages may be of great benefit to the members of the family and most importantly to the couple.
An arranged marriage occurs when a couple embraces the legal bonds of matrimony because of the planning and agreement of their guardians or families. The bride and groom may have little say in the matter because their parents and extended relatives negotiate the relationship as if it were a business arrangement.
It is imperative to remember that an arranged marriage is not a forced partnership. Different communities around the world force people together into a relationship they do not want for the betterment of the family or the culture. Couples who eventually get married through an arrangement usually meet each other and agree to a courtship facilitated by their family.
There are certainly some advantages to consider when a partner is chosen for you with an arranged marriage, but some disadvantages persist with this pairing even in the cultures that continue to practice it. These are the key points to review.
1. You already know what the goal of the relationship is when you first start dating.There are many people who want the element of surprise in their romantic relationships, much like you can see on the silver screen. Having someone unexpectedly propose seems like it would be a magical moment. For those who have gone through an arranged marriage, there is an advantage to consider when skipping this perspective. When you have an idea that matrimony is the intent of the relationship, then everyone can be clear about their expectations from the start.
2. Sharing values and traditions means there is one less obstacle.When there is an arranged marriage, then there are fewer cultural differences to navigate as you progress toward being a long-term couple. If you meet someone independently, there could be religious, educational, and occupational barriers in the way. Something as simple as being Catholic vs. Protestant in the United States can create conflict in families based on where the ceremony will be held or how the children are raised.
5. There are many different kinds of love stories.It is not unusual for someone in an arranged marriage to wonder if they had been in love with their spouse before they tied the knot. There are so many different love stories that involve falling for a person at first sight. The reality of life is that everyone, in any culture, can choose to love and embrace their own story, even if their families help to write it. Some people might chase down their lover, but it may be far easier to have your closest allies help you locate the individual who might be right for you.
7. Arranged marriages have less conflict in the home.Although this advantage of an arranged marriage is somewhat cultural, it is essential to point out that over half (55%) of the couples who enter into matrimony do so through this process. In the APAC region, some countries see rates of more than 90%. The global divorce rate from the relationships that form in this way is about five times lower than what it is in the West when individuals choose their life partner.
In an arranged marriage, families work together more often. There is a shared sense of social responsibility and financial security. This work goes beyond the desire to maintain the family culture or embrace tradition. Instead of worrying about compatibility, a couple can work toward their best interests. 2b1af7f3a8